The Balance of Life/ Deeper and harder than ever before
More than ever before is the balance of life present in my world. It may just be me but everything in my life always achieves a balance in one way or another. But there's a thing that no one ever realizes (or appreciates) about balance. That in order for something to go good something has to suffer. For a loose example: My schoolin' has been going really good thus my bloggin has been sufferin...though these may seem very unrelated they balance out. When your heart breaks you eventually mend it. I wrote a quiz on a book I have read 3 times and recieved a not so good mark and on the same day wrote a test on a book I have never read (and I rarely attend this class) and some how recieved the highest mark in the class. Sometimes achieving the balance takes a long time and sometimes the shifting of life moves things you are unaware of and make you feel as though you can't find any balance.
The second title I just realized could have a definate sexual connatation to it...but trust me its a lot deeper than that! Really I am writing in reference for some help because I think I am going into some uncharted territory for this kid, I am emotionally deeper in a relationship than I have ever been before (and fast approaching the timeline record as well). The thing is the deeper I get the harder I am falling...which is akward because it is near this point (I am a little past the usual point) that I begin to distance myself, where I start running around in my head and creating problems, finding things that are wrong. Thing is this time I have done that...but I haven't found anything, My mind hasn't created any problems...if anything my mind is doing the exact opposite and this feeling so foriegn is a feeling so truly amazing! I just hope it continues and for the first time I am not really worried about whether it will or not...I can feel that it will in my stomach (right beside those pesky butterflies!)
P.S. the new harry potter is pretty sweet
Song of the day: This is for you - Time and Distance
1 Comments:
Well Adam, it's funny you write this... I too have gotten to that point, that trying to look for things wrong, but I found them. But what it helped me to realize is why I look for these things and why it is that I find them. And I also know the reason why you haven't found them and that is this: When you take care of yourself the rest takes care of itself. The more you love yourself and take care of your life, the less insecure you are and the better you feel about the other relationships in your life. From what I understand you have really been turning things around. I put myself aside for only four days, four days!! And that was enough for me to get off track. I started worrying and panicking and over analyzing, until I realized that I was the problem. Once I jumped back on the treadmill, did some pilates, ate a good meal and smiled, everything in my world seemed right again. It took me a long time to learn this lesson and I'm glad you figured it out. "When we love, we always strive to become better than were are." - The Alchemist (read this book Adam and you will thank me).
November 23, 2005 at 12:11 p.m.
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