Soon to meet in memories

One of my earlier songs, not great but that ok I can live with it!

Over the course of your life you only get so many chances
to act on those time you catch those stolen glances
send a message back to her with that nervous smile
give her a little clue with your own nervous style
write her name on paper outline it with a heart
you want to go and talk to her but don't know where to start
you know that you just met her but known her all your life
she’s got a look for you as if she longs to be your wife
take to your riches and beyond the glory
though thats kinda hard when you havent started a story
love deep for one another though they've never had a talk
the hours of thier folley are measured by the clock
but the clock could never measure the wisdom they have gained
from that single moment the confessed thier love abstained
they both shared a laugh and went their seperate way
soon to meet in memories on another rainy day
Chorus:
soon to meet in memories and wander down that lane
wondering if you'll be different in hopes you are the same
soon to meet in memories and wander down that lane
wondering if you'll be there calling out my name
soon to meet in memories and wander down that lane
wondering if you'll be there waiting in the rain
soon to meet in memories and wander down that lane
wondering if your still hurt from our love lost pain
cause its just another memory and a trip back down that lane
cause its just another memory and a trip back to my shame
.......................................................trip back to my pain 

humilated in public and realized all your fears
every ounce of strength to hold back those warm tears
take the walk of shame down the pointing finger halls
to keep your head up proudly shows that you've got balls
shrug it off your shoulder when someone begins to laugh
don't let them knock you down or stray you from your path
be the stronger one be the one with class
beat em with your wit beat em with your sass
hold back those words of come back or stupid retaliation
use criticism as a crutch when you lean on that temptation
they don't understand your vision your not the one at fault
close that open wound don't let them pour on no more salt
torow has now come thier silence helps you forget
those feelings you had of shame doubt and regret
you'll look back on this moment and laugh a different way
soon to meet in memories on another rainy day
Chorus:
Soon to meet in memories wander through those stares
wondering to this day if I caught all thier glares
Soon to meet in memories wander through those stares
wondering to this day if they point in pairs
Soon to meet in memories wander through those stares
wondering to this day if those laughs have paid thier fares
Soon to meet in memories wander through those stares
wondering to this day if anyone still cares
cause its just another memory and a trip back through those stares
cause its just another memory and a trip back to my wares
.......................................................trip back to my cares 

I'm so fucking stupid I'm open for satire
I got my case of syphillis from the nobelest of fryars
so i guess you got my love and an extra little gift
I've always been about giving you an extra little lift
I tried to keep you out my rhymes for love we once had
our love was to great you were the best ever fad
of love and hate and hate and love apart in the end
I hope our tragic story has positive messages to send
the best part about our time was i gained a reputation
as a nice and sensitive bad boy that denies the alagation
you were the hot chick with the crazy nerd type guy
the time we spent together helped to soldify my lie 
I became well liked and popular to boot
girls hung on my arms they wore me like a suit
I look back now and wish I'd done it another way
soon to meet in memories on another rainy day
Chorus:
soon to meet in memories and wander round those hours
wondering why i scaraficed our love for temporary powers
soon to meet in memories and wander round those hours
wondering why I was the one to run away and cower
soon to meet in memories and wander round those hours
wondering why in our love so grand I was the one to sour
soon to meet in memories and wander round those hours
wondering what the pedals said when i picked the flowers
cause its just another memory and a trip back through those hours
cause its just another memory and a trip back to my tower2
...................................................listening to pedals on flowerson another of those rainy days
I can smile when it's raining
I can smile when it's raining
I can smile when it's raining...

Chains (finished)

This is the song that I adapted from a poem I earlier wrote.

In search of answers in search of truth
In search of understanding in search of youth
I am bleeding and I am hurt
Not unlike the wingless bird
We used to share our fears and delights
You were so cute whether wrong or right
We never felt afraid, cold or even lonely
Spend an hour apart the benefits we could not see
And those times there was no need to vocalize
Because you knew that I saw it in your eyes
I tremble when your near heat travels up my thighs
I want you with an urgency I just can’t describe
I longed to say I love you but was scared of your reply
Terrified like a child I’d become paralyzed
The camouflaged emotions lead to pain and silent cries
And yet I just can’t tell you don’t you see it in my eyes?
Confessing through this song my dilemma of goodbyes
The feelings quite mutual but will lead to my demise
Chorus:
You do not deserve my chains
All my baggage and inflicted pains
Dazed, I stare at the stars above
Unintended betrayal of love
My shooting star disappears from sight
Your name echo’s and fades into the night
It’s an eerie and mournful sound
That makes me crumble to the ground
There is no life within the garden
Like my dreams, my face begins to harden
And everything about you still seems so flawless
My guiding star has become the darkness
So unspoken our love remains
you do not deserve my chains

These streaks of pen that run down my arm
Used to symbolize how you could do no harm
We’d stay in bed filled with crimson joy
The secret of our love this does destroy
You knew how to ease all my fears
You made sure that old wound did not reappear
So naturally I hated those words and that sigh
See you later and then…and then goodbye
Those streaks of pen turned to blood
You threw my heart into the mud
When mad at you the more it made me hurt
Still so much love though I felt like dirt
But you know now all that does not matter
My spirits been broken bruised and battered
And now I sympathize with the like of Frankenstein
Cause I know what its like to be misunderstood all the time
I go back now…now and wonder why
The tears did not fall as I sighed and said goodbye
Chorus:
You do not deserve my chains
All my baggage and inflicted pains
Dazed, I stare at the stars above
Unintended betrayal of love
My shooting star disappears from sight
Your name echo’s and fades into the night
It’s an eerie and mournful sound
That makes me crumble to the ground
There is no life within the garden
Like my dreams, my face begins to harden
And everything about you still seems so flawless
My guiding star has become the darkness
So unspoken our love remains
You do not deserve my chains

We were so right despite the tendency
To disagree about every commonality
I was sure…sure you were my fate
My one and only…only true soul mate
We were falling and didn’t use our head
We listened to flowers and what the pedals said
She loves me…he loves me not
Then came the day you were distraught
About our love and what all the others meant
From the highest pedestal we began our descent
Those things I used to see as cute
Now made me want…want to puke
Your opinions were stupid and devoid of thought
Same places we’d laugh we now fought
I still had love but now it was changed
Your perception of our relationship had become deranged
This time I knew you saw it in my eyes
As the tears began to fall and we said our last goodbyes
Chorus:
You do not deserve my chains
All my baggage and inflicted pains
Dazed, I stare at the stars above
Unintended betrayal of love
My shooting star disappears from sight
Your name echo’s and fades into the night
It’s an eerie and mournful sound
That makes me crumble to the ground
There is no life within the garden
Like my dreams, my face begins to harden
And everything about you still seems so flawless
My guiding star has become the darkness
So unspoken our love remains
You do not deserve my chains

For granted...

Things get taken for granted everyday.  If we just appreciated one new thing each day the list would shrink and Life may not seem so bleak, the gloom cloud might bring tennis rain not gloomy rain!

My list of some of the things I take for granted
 
-Parents
-Car
-Health
-Self control
-Friendships
-Time alone
-windshields
-Words
-Leftovers
-Energy Bills
-Others Ideas
-My own Ideas
-Walking
-Talking
-Sight
-Hearing
-Free Health Care
-Many more things (just a short list)

For all the things we take for granted there as well are just as many that we appreciate to the fullest from the littlest of things like trampolines to the biggest of things like birth
Thank you all for everything you have given me, I appreciate it whether you know it or not!

"Sometimes its hard to be the lonesome smile in a crowd of frowns but your not alone..."
- Sweatshop Union

Upsets and self control

Everybody loves an upset except when you are the favorite.  So yet again the Red Sox of Saskatoon have failed to play to their potential and lose out of provincial. dang. I have realized I am a huge fan of karaokee but only when in a drunk state of mind! As well I found out that it begins to get light out at 4:30 and is completely light at 5:47 near the end of July.

Self Control
For the first time in a long time I have displayed some self control in a few aspects of life.  So very hard to control my hands and my words but I am trying. Cannot promise anything though.

"Life's just a game of inches,  and it's whoever is willing to live and die for that inch that is going to make it out alive. That's life..." - Al Pacino

Honesty

This is about as serious as I get so watch out people
When confronted with honesty a person realizes few things. Their true feelings, what kind of character they have really built and the honesty's/ half-truths they have hidden away.  It is strange how one can be the most talkative person at all times and then they are confronted with this straight forward honesty and they can not find the words to express any of their feelings, they just kind of freeze up and become quiet...Sort of try to fade away.  In all honesty "I was suprized at the display of my lack of true character"So we are at a fork, one path is a great path but we can actually see the end(or checkpoint I'd like to think) from where we are standing and the other has a big bend where we cannot see past but there is a potential for a grand path if it is chosen.  I am sorry for my faults, and any hurt I have bring to you. On the flip side I thank you for all your time, you honesty, your smile and your words of wisdom, they will be with me forever and nobody can change that!

The path we choose lead somewhere and that is all we know for sure, we can never see the end of a path only check points where one can decide to turn or keep on trucking.  Fate comes into play as path may stray from one another at some point but every now and then have a funny way of leading back to that very same path...Come on fate!

Smoke, Mirrors and Imaginary Friends

Smoke, mirrors and imaginary friends
They've been the only constant from beginnings to the ends
Smoke, mirrors and imaginary friends
They've been behind my scenes setting all my trends
Smoke, mirrors and imaginary friends
their always there to listen without answers that condescend
Smoke, mirrors and imaginary friends
They've been the only constant from huggies to depends

Smoke used as a screen after sex
Smoke cloaks those who bite the necks
Smoke often used to disguise the truth
Smoke seems appealing to the rebellious youth
Smoke confuses the perception of what's seen
Smoke it's only bad when not eighteen
Smoke the ultimate false sense of security
Smoke keeps people believing in the purity
Smoke keeps us believing in magic tricks
Smoke blown up our asses by those in politics
Smoke
Smoke
Smoke

Smoke, mirrors and imaginary friends
They've been the only constant from beginnings to the ends
Smoke, mirrors and imaginary friends
They've been behind my scenes setting all my trends
Smoke, mirrors and imaginary friends
their always there to listen without answers that condescend
Smoke, mirrors and imaginary friends
They've been the only constant from huggies to depends

Mirrors hide broken hearts and broken dreams
Mirrors hear many stories told through tear streams
Mirrors help to paint on face illusions
Mirrors used to make and clear up some confusions
Mirrors helps one see what's not there
Mirrors sympathize when no one else cares
Mirrors often used to place the blame
Mirrors the only one to know our true fame
Mirrors used to see personal reflections
Mirrors help and hurt our own personal connections
Mirrors
Mirrors
Mirrors

Smoke, mirrors and imaginary friends
They've been the only constant from beginnings to the ends
Smoke, mirrors and imaginary friends
They've been behind my scenes setting all my trends
Smoke, mirrors and imaginary friends
their always there to listen without answers that condescend
Smoke, mirrors and imaginary friends
They've been the only constant from huggies to depends

Imaginary Friends know all of our fault and sorrows
Imaginary Friends forget yesterdays and about tomorrows
Imaginary Friends sympathize with all of our regrets
Imaginary Friends the only one to keep tight our deepest secrets
Imaginary Friends always there when you need them
Imaginary Friends won't pressure you into the deep end
Imaginary Friends will leave you alone when that's all that you want
Imaginary Friends have been beside you for the disappointment talks
Imaginary friends may not be real but sure are true
Imaginary Friends all their love and loyalty given right to you
Imaginary Friends
Imaginary Friends
Imaginary Friends

Smoke, mirrors and imaginary friends
They've been the only constant from beginnings to the ends
Smoke, mirrors and imaginary friends
They've been behind my scenes setting all my trends
Smoke, mirrors and imaginary friends
their always there to listen without answers that condescend
Smoke, mirrors and imaginary friends
They've been the only constant from huggies to depends

The Fight. The Result. The Atheist.

When two worlds were on a course in which they would collide
Lucifer took me by the ear with some free advice to provide
All about the rules and how they are to be defied
God took my other ear with his secrets to confide
He said don't listen to the devil you know that he has lied
You know the world in which you should pay your tithe
You know the rules are there for you to abide
So come to my garden and forever eden you shall reside
The voices in each ear continued and strangely began to coincide
All they had me pondering was when their talking would subside
But they just kept getting louder and tried forcing me to decide
They kept up with the yelling forcing me to choose a side
God telling me the truth is the only thing he has supplied
Lucifer telling me that I should be my own guide
This went on for days, months, years until I finally replied
"Lucifer your wrong!" and "God all your thoughts I have denied!"

Overtime

Going to write them down and they shall be updated when they can be.  You will know when they are done!!
I have so many unfinished songs...though the words are again starting to come since fate intervened!
Overtime
 
I've travelled side roads and walked down dirt paths
I've caught dirty looks and been on both sides of the laughs
I've cried when I was happy and smiled when sad
I've worn my heart on my sleeve and wrote it down on scratch pads
I've loved and I've lost and been caught up in day dreams
I've endured the good with the bad, the hugs with the screams
I've been down in the dumps and up on cloud nine
I've searched for the ladder and used it for both ways to climb
I've sucumb to my doubts and done the opposite of good
I've regreted some choice but would not change them if I could
I've learned from mistakes, scrapped knees and black eyes
I've made peace with the past and forgiven all the lies
I've appolagized without feeling and I'm sorry for that
I've wished I was different and that the words I could take back
I've felt pains in my stomach from swallowing guilt
I've lashed out at others from internal rage built
I've hid from the critics, true love and my fears
Never letting myself feel the hurt or relive the pain of falling tears
I've failed many times and still veiw myself as a success
I've often walked around naked just to feel the joy of getting dressed
I've let myself Believe again and live life Like sudden death overtime
Learned to never hold back because I've found a new thin line...

YEEHAW!

Calgary. Last Weekend of the stampede. Country music. C-Train. Beer, beer, beer. Baseball.  Not much more has to be said!  What a weekend!...I have never heard a song played so many times in one night than save a horse ride a cowboy!

I'm just killing time as time is killing me
I've got a mind full of dreams that can never be...Yet I can never let them go!

Unfinished Happy Song

This is my happy song
Right now can't nothing go wrong
Finally it's all going my way
The light is finally shining and it is my day
everything going right and moving right along
And that's why I'm singing this happy song
 
It's all so good and it's all so right
I've moved out of the dark and back into the light
I've replaced the frown with this temporary smile
And the layered look I've been rockin is coming back in style
I lost my job but then found 20 dollars
And I think I'm getting bigger or atleast everyone else is gettin smaller
Got my ass kicked and yet still got the number of the girl
Apparently she likes skinny wusses and hair with natural curl
The thoughts I've been thinking have finally been expressed
I no longer have to keep them hidden I no longer feel depressed
When you drop change in my cup I'll respond with a thanks and a hug
And if you looking for my smiling ass I'll be dancing in da club
 
This is my happy song
Right now can't nothing go wrong
Finally it's all going my way
The light is finally shining and it is my day
everything going right and moving right along
And that's why I'm singing this happy song
 
Ok so its not a great song..in all actuality one of my worst, but when listening to it with a beat its just so fun and when your in a good mood it just fits.  Still has to be finished though...
 
Cheese cake and VW vans...You've got to be kidding me...Chalk up a few more points
 
YELLOW!!!
 
"I'll never forget the first time I heard that pretty mouth say a dirty word like that...I live for little moments like that" - Brad Paisley (so I listen to country sometimes big deal!)
 
 

Names

Everything possible has been done of what you've demanded
And yet you call me those names as if I've been branded
What did I do to you? Did I throw sticks and stones
Did I make fun of your weight...Mr. All skin and bones
Did I point out that your teeth are all coffee stained
What's that you say? You don't like being called names
It makes you feel little and hurts deep inside
Brings feelings of doubt and creates a great loss of pride
So what makes it ok when you say it to me
And now that your eyes have been opened will you use them to see
Or will you leave the blindfold on and stay in the dark
The bites eventually heal but were forever scarred by the bark

Smitten

I look forward to Mid afternoon naps
Because then I can dream of you
only to be sad when I awake
I think I am I need of a rescue...

"Never let anyone lead you to believe..." - Slug

Reflections of self...Reflections of reality

The Stranger

I once met this stranger who bore the tattooed tears
Always crying without choice for the rest of his years
He is sorrowing man's sins for the rest of eternity
Taking part in the everlasting slow dance with destiny
These permanent tears forever showing man's emotion
Never failing to fall like the crashing waves of the ocean

When I came upon this stranger all he said was change
I turned around to ponder this question asked so strange
This man's words and selfless act made me ponder about choice
Do we choose our words? Is what we hear our own voice?
Because I know if I had a choice I'd quit writing these songs
I wouldn't agree with the rights and would stop correcting all the wrongs
and I wouldn't run the race without a 3 hour lead
and I would never wipe the tears that fall for all who bleed
I'd drop all old habits and do whatever I please
I'd unclasp the hands and get up off my knees
I'd listen to my own voice and not what others say
And I'd wait again for the man who is crying everyday

I once met this stranger who bore the tattooed tears
Always crying without choice for the rest of his years
He is sorrowing man's sins for the rest of eternity
Taking part in the everlasting slow dance with destiny
These permanent tears forever showing man's emotion
Never failing to fall like the crashing waves of the ocean

The memory of this man and his acceptance of choice
Kind of makes me choke up and for my eyes to become moist
It gets me to thinking of how many choices we are granted
How some are up to us and the others have been implanted
Because I know without choice I wouldn't do what I want
I wouldn't feel the hate that compels me to taunt
And I wouldn't have to hide behind all of my convictions
And if I didn't want to I wouldn't have to share any life depictions
I could hang put with myself and get wasted off bacardi
I could begin making the list of guests for my surprise birthday party
I would forget every acquaintance except for the one that remember me
I would toy with dreams but still never f**k with a memory
Because I once had a memory...

It was about that same stranger who bore the tattooed tears
Always crying without choice for the rest of his years
He is sorrowing man's sins for the rest of eternity
Taking part in the everlasting slow dance with destiny
Those permanent tears forever showing man's emotion
Never failing to fall like the crashing waves of the ocean
Those permanent tears forever showing man's emotion
Never failing to fall like the crashing waves of the ocean

I once had a memory
I once had a memory
I once had a memory...

10

I am the perfect 10...the only problem is the score is out of 100!

I look foward to Mid afternoon naps
Because then I can dream of you...a work in progress

Let the gong show roll...

Pulled groin, pulled lat muscle, swollen finger, head hurts, liver hates me, stomach in turmoil...and yet it was an absolutely awesome time!

Amidst the drinking and well drinking still found time for a profound thought or 2

profound thought one:
Sitting in the pool and hot hot sun drinking stiffies of rye and coke or gin and 7 equals getting wasted

profound thought two:
You only really realize the creepiness of your friends until they are drunk...but it is quite hilarious!

Profound thought three:
Out of sight does not necessarily mean out of mind, in fact it often has an adverse effect where the mind is more cluttered than ever. Beer goes in the left hand, pride in the right and your mind can wander where it pleases at any time.

They call him the streak...

Well made it to day 50 of the latest personal challenge streak and I will just say it ended with a bang haha

To truly know your limits you must challenge yourself. Go until you can not anymore and hold out for 3 more days!

Try challenging yourself to stupid pointless things, see how strong willed you actually are, for example:
-Try to be a vegetarian for a week, absolutely no meat..If that's to easy for you try being a vegan and do not eat any meat or meat bi-product
-Try putting one song on repeat in your car for a week without ever changing it or listening to the radio. (suggested that you pick a song you like a lot)
-Try going one week with out any pleasure, whether it be self gratification, to no junk food, to watching television...Maybe try reading a medical text book unless you are becoming a doctor because you may actually get pleasure out of that.
-Try to not drive anywhere for a week, take the bus, ride a bike. Funny thing is some people even walk in this crazy world!
-Trade CD's with a friend in which you 2 have nothing musically in common and honestly listen to their music for a month. See if you do not appreciate it at all by the end of the month

If none of these float your boat try one of your own, you can not exceed your limits until you know what they are!

Summer Apologies...

I truthfully am sorry
I make things complicated
I don't want to hurt you
I wish into black I could be faded
Summer romance
Close it out as friends
I know its hard
But might be for the best in the end

Butterflies and Trampolines

Lying on the grass behind blackened mosquito screens
Underneath the stars planning out our dreams
Sunsets and watching trains roll on by
Late nights spent drying those tears you cry
Entire mornings wasted undercover
Fighting over who's a better lover
And I just want to hold your hand
It's going to be ok, use your angel wings to land
And I just want to hold your hand
I don't want to let go, you have to understand

Stomach butterflies and backyard trampolines
Cuddling under blankets watching movie scenes
Sitting on swing sets late at night
Gaze upon the half moon the feeling so right
Trying not to fall but knowing its far too late
You caught me with your smile or we can blame it all on fate
Now I have fallen and don't want to get up
Part our separate ways and meet up just by luck
Or live every day as if it is our last
No secrets to be hidden, every truth is unmasked
Inhibitions gone and no more need for any lies
Backyard trampolines and stomach butterflies

The hood of my car on a rainy day
Knowing every word and yet having nothing to say
Love songs on the radio in the middle of July
Dreams filled with vision of nothing but you and I
Driving without purpose right into the dark
Eskimo kisses and holding hands in the park
Flowers for no reason and late 3 am calls
Where the talk is about nothing except the chasing of waterfalls
Waiting all day for a time such as this
When I get to hold you and begin with a simple kiss

Stomach butterflies and backyard trampolines
Cuddling under blankets watching movie scenes
Sitting on swing sets late at night
Gaze upon the half moon the feeling so right
Trying not to fall but knowing its far too late
You caught me with your smile or we can blame it all on fate
Now I have fallen and don't want to get up
Part our separate ways and meet up just by luck
Or live every day as if it is our last
No secrets to be hidden, every truth is unmasked
Inhibitions gone and no more need for any lies
Backyard trampolines and stomach butterlies

Making me believe at the very first sight
What if's keeping me awake each and every night
Pigtails, blueskies and a bike ride in the rain
Thunderstorms, biting you lips and miles away from plain
With great anticipation waiting by the phone
In hopes to hear your voice but just getting dial tone
Talking with the lights off, never noticing the hours
Chocolate sauce, cowgirl hats and of course late night showers
A sensual touch and yet its your soul I feel
I have fallen hard for a girl named real

Stomach butterflies and backyard trampolines
Cuddling under blankets watching movie scenes
Sitting on swing sets late at night
Gaze upon the half moon the feeling so right
Trying not to fall but knowing its far too late
You caught me with your smile or we can blame it all on fate
Now I have fallen and don't want to get up
Part our separate ways and meet up just by luck
Or live every day as if it is our last
No secrets to be hidden, every truth is unmasked
Inhibitions gone and no more need for any lies
I'll always have backyard trampolines and stomach butterflies

books of notes

postion still filled

1 through 4

There are, in the very basics of it, 4 types of friends

Type 1: The acquaintance
- Small Talk about weather, news and random no personal stuff is required
- Usually First name basis...Last name is an option...Often known better as "dude", "hey you" or "Pal" because real name is not necessarily known
- Only contact with one another is by chance, a shared friends gathering or at the local drinking establishment in which you both frequent
- Often end the conversations with "see you around", "well it was good to see you" or "Hopefully run into you again soon"

Type 2: The vicinity Friend
- Often friends because forced to be in the same vicinity with one another for long periods of time. Ex: Co-worker, Share a class together, Involved in same sporting/ community events or for the younger crowd attending the same school
- Conversation is deeper than one with "the acquaintance" but not to much. Often know personal details about one another's life, but do not have all that much interest in them
- First and often Last name basis
- Know some of one another's likes and dislikes but not to extensively
- Often end the conversations with "I have got to get going but we should get together sometime" or "good seeing you, I will be in touch"
- There is potential for the vicinity Friend to change into a type 3

Type 3: The Buddy
- Considered to be a good friend
- Can trust them most of the time
- conversation is often quite interesting, personal details are known about one another and often will listen to one another's problems
- First and Last name basis and sometimes a nickname
- Usually good for a laugh and a beer, some have even been known to be a shoulder to cry on
- Know each others likes and dislikes, frequently have same likes and are good for debate about the dislikes
- Often end the conversations with "good time, talk to you later" or "I will call you later this week buddy"

Type 4: Best friends
- This friend is always there during the good times and bad, whether or not your talking to them
- You would trust them with your life
- Conversations are amazing, no matter how trivial they are
- They know pretty much everything about you, all your secrets, indiscretion, likes, dislikes etc.
- When you haven't talked to each other for a long time (such as 6 months etc.) you two fall right back into the old rhythm as if you had just talked with them yesterday
- They are there to listen to your problems, offer their advice and help you drink it all away
- Nicknames first (usually more than one), then last name and finally first name is used usually when mad or desperately need to get the others attention
- Often end conversations with a hug/ kiss, "I will talk to you later tonight", "see you tomorrow" or "you're the shit, this was a great time. Peace"

Chains

You do not deserve my chains
All my baggage and inflicted pains
My dreams and face begin to harden
As I look upon our love lost garden
Whispers of the wind I heard all to well
Telling me of how hard in love I fell
And though no words between us were spoken
My heart was battered, bruised and broken
Still longed to say I love you but scared of the reply
Hoping you'd accept but knowing you'd deny
So our love unspoken remains
You do not deserve my chains

Numero uneo...

I have decided to start one of these blog things. I write this realizing that I probably will be the only one to read it, but none the less I shall write my thoughts down.

Lately I was faced with a question from a good friend. The question is quite irrelevant but I have been thinking about my answer a lot, and by a lot I meant a lot. At the time I answered "I am not letting myself...". Now that I have hindsight, and we all know that it is clearer than a crystal ball, I have decided to change my answer. F**k it all, I said I wasn't letting myself but the problem is I already have let myself. I am in a lot deeper than I had first thought and I like it a lot. I have fallen and I don't want to get up! So I have decided to throw out all my inhibitions and go for it, bet everything I have on that one dark horse and have no regrets to show for it because in the end its better to have been hurt for trying than to have not tried at all, to sound all to cliche.

To quote a great man (who just happens to be myself adapted from all other philosophies on life): "Life's a bitch and then you die. Might as well have a good time while were here"

Peace