The Weird Things We Save

so i was looking through all the things I have saved on my Microsoft word since the last time I did a full sweep of the computer and here are a few random savings: (can't remember if I finished all of these..I know have for one or 2)
Cloud Nine (unfinished)
Eyes locked into one another
Stares that could never be broken
Hands gripped in sweaty embrace
Body movement the only thing spoken
Promises of forever
Wrapped tightly in sweet nothings
Words lost in heartbeat
While still being meaningful somethings

Random Conversation with My First crush of High School in 3rd year university on ICQ (I'm Rapzillatron...my former white rapper name right after it was monkey feces/ sir vive/ writehanded)
Honey Rockwell (2:03 AM) :
I like you.
Rapzillatron (2:03 AM) :
thanks
Honey Rockwell (2:04 AM) :
In like a crush way but don't tell anyone.
Rapzillatron (2:04 AM) :
haha thats awesome!!
Honey Rockwell (2:05 AM) :
cool, well I'm going to go to sleep now. bye for now.
Rapzillatron (2:05 AM) :
good night!!

Some thing I saved titled: Snipits of Songs
i write these words for you only you to hear
though my vanity is half price its still full of fear
the letter and broken mirror now 7 years past
and the courage behind those words i still havent amassed
the fear of those two single letters in the form of your answer
has taken over my life and spread faster than cancer
thinking so much about a simple little kiss
as if the decision made wrong will result in the appocalypse
you use powder and foundation to hide from yourself
you use store bought confidence and put the real stuff away on the shelf
i stood at full posture and was still only half of a man
dwelling on all what’s past and no thought to what's began


I'll see her there and wonder hmm where to begin
then yell a fuck you and flipper the dolphin
er I mean the bird lets pretend that was unheard
shit I mean unseen lets start over and wipe the slate clean

i got left in the basement and started to hallucanate
had visions of my past and what is to be my fate


blank pages beware because i'm writehanded
you call me those names as if i've been branded
what did i do to you..did i throw sticks n stones
did i make fun of your weight..mr. all skin n bones

i'm the lyrical jester who just stole the crown
i saw you on the way up as you were on your way down
my smilin is what caused yours to become a frown
i'm the funny one and yet your the stupid clown

i've travelled side roads and i've walked down dirt paths
i've caught dirty looks and been on both sides of the laughs
i've cried cause i was happy and smiled when i was sad
i've worn my heart on my sleeve and put it down on this scratch pad


my mouth is like a heaven for words
but i lost my angel wings when i abandoned the herd
well they said abandoned i said moved on
i mean i was gettin tired because we were flyin for so long
without... any purpose or direction
and yet i never spoke up because i was affraid of the rejection
of my ideas, opinions and maybe my thoughts
or maybe i was just afraid of the battle that would be fought
and that it would result in the loss of my wings
and now there gone anyway and my summers lost its spring

I was just fine on cloud nine until I was tempted by ten

So what the whole point of this is that some of the things we keep close to us do not make any sense what-so-ever but yet they mean something. Had I not saved these to my hard drive I would have never remembered them...in the same respect if I didn't have that horrilbe memory of Chris Bartch hitting me in the leg with a softball bat because I said he swings like a girl in grade 6 I would never remember him (damned bastard). The things we keep become a part of us and ultimately shape our decisions, our personalities, our futures and have an effect on everything we do!

Anyway I am sick and in one of those moods where your head makes sense to you and only you so if you can figure out what I am talking about let me know!
If a picture is worth a thousand words does it take a thousand words to paint a picture...
If I could only be 7 again and had to decide which girl to throw dirt at, the one you like or the one that smells like cat food...