Sick Day Dreams, Origins and Life's Little Soundtracks

Have you ever awaken to a beautiful day and decided today would be a great day to call in sick. Well today I did just that and I caught up on many things...such as sleep! But as I sat outside on the deck I drifted off to sleep and had the same style of dream as I have been having lately. Inaudible dreams...everything is as it seems and I am living out some everyday thing except for some reason I cannot hear anything I am saying, anything others are saying to me. Its not that were not happy and its something I should not be hearing. In all actuallity it seems the exact opposite, its like were having an amazing time and I am not allowed to participate. Now dreams are really there to give us something to do while were sleeping and something to dwell on...so then the freaky thing happens where I had a dream about a friend the other day and as the rest had been it was all inaudible until I came upon this certain friend and with her loooking at me I asked "are you happy" and she turned away, I stepped infornt again and asked "are you happy?" and she turned away. But it wasn't as if she was mad it was as if she was thinking and the way I asked the question was not as if I were prying it was more of a "are you havign a good time in this circle of everyone"...so I as I slept on the deck today the inaudible party continued where I was having a great time with all my friends and others I didn't know yet nothing could be heard. So I think maybe I have just been running myself ragged to be everywhere at once that this signifies that I need to slow down a little...or could just be a dang ole dream that just helps to pass the time!

So I haven't been on here in a little while becuase I have been trying to keep busy but this one concept has been sticking in my brain...I don't know if concept is the word I am looking for but I don't feel like deleting it...anyway the whole thing revolves around the blog and the creator of a "blog" and how really it is just a overglorified diary...and because of this overgolification if makes it ok for guys...really if it was called a diary or rainbow sunshine read time alot of guys would find it way too femine. So lets raise our glasses or whatever you have infront of you to the man that made this all possible Doogie Howser M.D. (Neil Patrick Harris)..yeah I really do believe that he was the originator of the blog, the boy genious doctor himself!

So I am sure at one point or another in all of anyone who reads this's life they have had a soundtrack to life. Thier most romantic moment goes with this song, worst moment with this song, happy times this song, party times this song etc etc etc... But this past week and half I put a bunch of random songs on my new mp3 player and just listened to them sporadically...and seriously the list was on random play setting, I just threw random songs on there and some way somehow the songs played in a perfect soundtrack to the thoughts in my head, to everything I was doing and thinking. It was kind of creepy but awesome all in the same. But in order to change this I went out bought a bunch of new cd's...punk goes 80's, circa survive, warped tour 2004 compilation (stage 1 and 2), Armor for Sleep (again as my old disc decided to get up and walk away), Rise of the underground (was free with 3 purchases of the same genre) and Hot hot Heat. So I figure these should distrupt the unity of songs playing in my head lately and if not well then I guess everything in my head from music to thoughts to dreams are fucked up and then I can truly claim to be EMO...well like the true sense of emo that is..if there is even a true sense anymore (right em)

Anyway I am back outside to enjoy the rest of my sick day and get ready for tomorrow's day of work!
PEACE

could have knocked off the evening...

Culture Clash

So I am one that supports other culutres...I love other cultures. But what is getting under my skin lately is the newest culutre that is being stripped of its uniqueness and begining to be Americanized. Australian lingo is now the hottest thing to quote out there i.e. cheers, good on ya, no worries etc. I love australians, I think that accent is the most attractive and hot thing ever...but you cannot go anywhere without some one trying to use this lingo as if it were an everyday thing for them...LEAVE IT IN AUSTRALIA!!

What I find quite ironic is that the 2 cultures that influence all the popular culture are what I believe to be the african american and australian...African americans have been viewed by all racist white american bastards to be synonimus with crime and australia was founded when the criminals were sent there

thus the lesson is to be cool you have to come from a "criminal" background...or just steal someone identity

I kind of equate this to really good bands becoming popular like when I first the MCR cd and loved them and now one of my good friends who has bad taste in music (for example her top 3 are brittany spears, nickelback and the simpson sisters) is sitting in my car and is like "wow you listen to MCR I totaly love the only 2 songs of thiers I have heard that get played on much music, they are like so hardcore and I just want to scream out thier lyrics when I listen to them though I don't really listen to the lryical content I just think its a ctahcy sound". Sooon she will be comming up and burning me cds that have a range from creed to brand new to george straight and tell me its a greatest songs ever cd...I really hope brand new doesn't get huge...though they totaly deserve it cause they rock but you know when "your"bands becoem popular and airheads start liking them its alot harder to admit they are "your"bands!

Anyway thats the rant for the day...like rant city eh!

tomorrows special: something less rant like and more about how I view life!

The Love Blog

Technology 2 Adam 0...again I wrote a blog and puched save draft instead of post...so now its up...not like its that good anyway...but alas on to the Love Blog!!

Love
Love is a word that describes an amazing feeling inside ones self for someone or something else.
This being said I have found that a large amount of people are in love with being in love. They are not acctually in love they just have heard how wonderful this concept is and have decided that it would be a grand old time. Think back how many times have you started dating someone because you thought they were hot or your friends said you 2 would be good together or you had stuff in common or she looked good in pictures (haha) or something completely pointless? Now how many times have you started dating someone or hanging around with them because they gave you funny feelings on the inside and your mind started racing with thoughts of "love". You know its not love but the beginings...there is something that could grow, that same feeling can become stronger and stronger and you want to spend more and more time with that one special person. But I believe to truly fel love you have to of been in love with being in love at some point...and if you deny you have been in love with this concept just look back at any crush, and b/f or g/f any of those and realize that it was nothing more than wanting something badly and not that something found you.

Anyway I am gone like a truth from Don King's vocabulary

p.s. The movie has a plot...who woulda figured...Jay we gotta start writing again!

p.p.s. Graham we gotta guitar it up again soon

p.p.p.s. ummmm Daneel is awesome!

p.p.p.p.s. word up to em, linner, mike moroson, jebus, my grandmother, and anybody else that reads this thing!

p.p.p.p.p.s. "Can't take my mind off of you"

Support

Today sucks but is awesome all in the same way.
I lose something amazing to flying trapeeze...yet I don't lose anything at all
I had to say goodbye...but I know it will be sooner than I think a hello (and a big ass friggin hug!)
So many more things that words can't describe

I realized a few things on the way home:
I really have a problem of falling asleep while driving...like really it was 2 in the afternoon!
One of my favorite things in the world acctually can piss me off quite a bit as well...that guy had his left signal on for an hour no jokes!!
You can know who your best friends are by looking at what they do for you without asking for any thing at all in return...such as offering a drink, writing an ode, lending you some socks or a shirt, picking you up from across town cause your car doesn't want to work that day, come to your ball games even though they don't like baseball in the least, saying your hair looks really extra bad today
learning guitar is harder than first imagined...but easier than I acctually thought it was gonna be!! Power Chord Woot!! (thanks graham!)
I am freaking happy...I got rejected by education those assholes but I am still ear to ear grinning and happy as hell!!

I Need a shower and have a ball game to get to!!

"If I gave you my number would it still be the same"

Hard Roads and Brick Walls

A 2 part blog.
HARD ROADS
Not all people have travelled down hard roads and some people have never known anything but hard roads. And then there are those whom have travelled both roads. The thing you will see is those that rarely (if ever) have travelled those roads will never complain about the rough times, those that travel that road everyday are at peace with it. Then there are those that travel both roads equally and you will see that half of them just put the smile on no matter which road it is and live without care...then you will see others that are just bitter at life and focus only on the days spent traveling the hard road. Like my supervisor Terry, which is the whole reason for this blog. Terry has never been married because "women are all money grubbing bitches", he has worked the same "effing job that goes no where and can't wait til I get outta this hell hole", he has lived in "this dank hole of a city" for 62 years of life. Terry findds things to bitch about at all points in the day and at first I found it funny...but now its just kind of depressing. So my goal for the summer is to remind him of the no so hard roads that he every now and then alludes to and gets this wierd creepy smile (but i think its a happy smile as its the only smile I have seen from this man). I have found the 3 things now that bring out this smile...gardening and birds are number 1 and 2 in his books which I have no idea about but I am trying to show an interest and I can tell he likes feeling as though he is better than I am because he knows what I do not...but the kicker is going to be baseball, his child hood love. Terry loves baseball and that creepy smile comes out, and he shows genuine interest in what I have to say regarding it...and the other day he came into work and said that he saw my name in the paper for gettin the win in a game and then didn't talk for 2 hours and then when he did he just bitched about the city and the roads and the way the cowas smelled....but it was a start to see that no so hard terry come out!

part 2
BRICK WALLS
In life we put walls up around everything to keep things out. In most of my life I would like to say I have very few walls that have been built with out doors or atleast some windows and these are always open. But around my heart have a brick wall and I can honestly say it has never been completely broken down...one time before the bricks were being dismantled and then as happens with any all when it had to be re built, higher than ever before. But as I write this the wall is being again taken down piece by piece, faster every moment. I believe that when the birck wall around a heart is finally totally brought down we build up but not like we used to, we build this one with new bricks, stolen from anothers brick wall surrounding the heart, where only this other knows the openings and how to get past the wall.

all my blogs make sense in my head and then when I get home or on here they all come out like blah...meh the point gets out there, just fill in your own profound words around the plot

I am pumped cause me and mr Jay gall are a good writing team...except for the whole writing part and thinking of a plot...but other than that Miss Canada!!!

Also pumped that I possibly will be gettin lesson one of my guitar this week with Gray Ham...then my band will offically get off the ground!

Anyway I am out like a trout on a bus

"I don't know how to hold you without shaking"